Title: Give Me...Nothing (ch. 3)
Pairing: ??? x Kyo
Summary: When you're left out of touch with man kind, can you measure time? Or is time merely at the control of who's in control of you? Meet Niimura Tooru--a 32 year old musician who awakens and finds himself completely dependent on someone he can't even see. Can obsession equal love, and can delusions become reality?
Rating: NC-17 over all and this chapter
Warnings: violence, language, non-con, rape
Disclaimer: Don't own them, blabalbla.
Word Count: 3535
Previous Chapters: Chpter 1 || Chapter 2
Author's Note: You finally get to know who it is, guys! Aren't you happy? :]



It was the same routine over and over again, so much so that he had lost track of how many times he had gone through the same ordeal. Kyo would wake up, thrash and scream for what felt like an eternity, the man would come into his room, more fighting would ensue, the occasional strike or physical abuse, followed by the insane rambling of the man wanting to apologize for harming him. Then he would be given a pathetic excuse for a meal and left to his own devices. Rinse and repeat. The only escape from this terrifyingly mundane routine were the baths he was forced to take but even those caused his skin to crawl with disgust. He was lucky to have gone through this entire time without getting raped. Of course, the touching was equally as bad in his opinion but he thanked God for every day that the man had refrained from touching him.

The vocalist was still chained to the bed, blind fold over his eyes. He had forgotten what sight and moving freely felt like. It was like they were being erased from his mind. Kyo couldn't explain it, but he felt like he relied completely on his kidnapper. A sudden chill gripped his body and he shivered on the bed, for a brief moment fearing what it would be like if he were just left here. If the man left he would die, he depended on him like an infant depended on their mother. His mind began to race. He found himself adoring the man that held him captive. Without him he was nothing, just a worthless heap of flesh. His heart sped in his chest, like a humming bird flapping it's wings.

“I'm going to die here,” Kyo whispered to himself, disgusted by the sound of his voice. He hated himself, he had grown to become disgusted with everything about himself. For a brief moment he was grateful for not having sight, because he was sure to hate himself even more if he could look at himself. With his constant being alone for long intervals of time, Kyo was forced to entertain himself with his own mind. He had started to hate the sound of his voice, the feel of his skin, the contours of every part of him. He was disgusting, and the fact that he was frequently touched by another man no less only added to that disgust.

Maybe there was a reason all of this was happening. Maybe he deserved to die. Maybe this was God's way of punishing him for his disgrace. The thought drew a groan from his lips as he twisted uncomfortably on the bed. His limbs were restless, he needed to get off of this bed and do something. His wrists were on fire from the handcuffs that were constantly on him and his ankles equally as raw. Kyo swallowed hard, wondering vaguely how long it had been since he had awoken, since he had disappeared. Did the world still continue out there without him? Had the band moved on? Had everyone given up hope? Should he?

All this thinking brought him to the verge of tears for the umpteenth time in he didn't even know how long. Kyo wanted out, desperately. He wanted some sort of affirmation that he was worth something to somebody, that someone still cared if he were alive or dead. Because God knew that he didn't care anymore, not at this point. But who would care for a disgusting being like himself? His thoughts grew more forlorn. The band was probably glad he was gone, the vocalist who distanced himself from everyone and regarded them as co-workers rather than friends. He was just some jack ass that they worked with, they could replace him. Or they would go their separate ways, move on with their lives. The thought made him feel cold all over.

But...at least he still had the man who kept him here. That was something, right? He still meant something to him. In his eyes he was precious. Kyo began to feel his body tremble, stricken with another panic attack. He needed the man in here, he needed to feel like he was still wanted on this earth. Immediately he began screaming, screaming at the top of his lungs. It was a wordless scream, filled with more fear in his voice than he had shown throughout the entire duration of his stay in this hell hole. Kyo didn't even want escape at this point, he wanted validation. Anything was better than this...!

The man's screaming had been so loud that he didn't even hear the door slamming open and the quick foot steps of someone approaching. His shoulders were grabbed, body shook as the man tried to snap him out of his attack. Kyo simply screamed louder, body tense as he broke into a fresh batch of hysteric sobbing. He balled his hands into tight fists above his head, his entire frame shaking head to toe as he screamed out in almost non-sensible words,

“Love me! Please just love me. I'm sorry, whatever I did. Oh God I'm sorry. Please. Please!” He didn't even know what he was pleading for, forgiveness or affection. He needed something warm, not the cold hits and touches that he received every waking moment. His body felt cold, like he had been dipped into a tub of ice. Kyo couldn't even feel the hands desperately trying to bring him back to whatever reality this was.

“I do love you!” The man shouted, anger in his voice. “I've been telling you this since I brought you here. I love you more than anything in the world. Why else would I have brought you away from the world you despised so much? Because we can be together, here, we don't need anyone else. It can be just you and me, Kyo. Like it should have been since the beginning.”

Tears were rolling down the small man's cheeks in rivers, his chest heaving as he tried to fill his lungs with air. “I love you,” Kyo spoke with a trembling voice, feeling as if his mind had just snapped into two. “I love you,” he didn't even know this man, “I love you,” he had no reason to feel anything but hate for him, “I love you!” But he needed him so much, without him surely he'd die. Surely.

There was silence for a fleeting moment that felt like an eternity in this immeasurable place, and then the sound of the handcuffs on his wrists being snapped off. Next came ones around his ankles. “Kyo you made me so happy! You have no idea how long I've waited to hear those words from you,” the man spoke with a satisfied tone, surprisingly strong arms wrapping tightly around Kyo and holding him to his chest. Kyo could feel that he was much shorter than this man as his wet cheek pressed to his chest, body trembling as he held back onto his captor as tight as he could. He wanted him to squeeze him to death, to break every bone in his body and suffocate all his internal organs, anything to make the terror in his mind stop.

Though as he clung onto the man he seemed to slowly come back down to reality. He didn't love this man. He was forced to under the circumstances. There was no one else, just him. And now that he had untied him...Hope seized the vocalist. It was finally here, all his time of waiting and behaving as best he could finally paid off. Kyo was finally able to make an escape. Carefully he pulled away from the man, gently taking his arms off of him and prying the other's off of himself, as well. But he didn't want him to realize that he was trying to make an escape, so Kyo was quick to come up with an alternative to distract the bastard. He leaned forward blindly, lips touching what felt like the man's throat. He heard the man gasp with obvious surprise and enjoyment, and as soon as he got him off guard Kyo ripped the blind fold off of his face and punched the man hard in the gut.

As he heard the man gasp and groan in pain, body doubling forward, he took his chance to get the fuck out of there. He didn't even waste time trying to figure out who the man was as he sprang himself up from the bed and ran to the silhouette of the door frame in the darkened room, only now registering that the bare room was void of any windows. Kyo yanked the door open and ran out into the hall way of what appeared to be an apartment building, crying out in pain as the searing white lights of the room hit his sensitive eyes. He was momentarily blinded, head throbbing in pain from the exposure as he covered his eyes and ran blindly to the left.

He reached one hand out to as he held the other over his eyes, used to the dark and not to this painful light. As soon as the wall stopped he pried the hand away from his face, hissing at the pain to his eyes as he made out what appeared to be a staircase. He grabbed onto the rail and ran down the stairs despite the fact that he could barely see anything, quick to misjudge the depth of the stairwell as he tripped over his own two feet and tumbled fast down the remainder of the stairs. Kyo cried out in pain, both from the light exposure and the ache in his limbs from the fall. He had to get up, he had to before that sick bastard found him.

As Kyo looked up at the top of the staircase someone appeared. His body froze in fear as he figured it was the kidnapper, but the stunned face on the top of the floor he had been on was one that immediately set him at ease. The face was one he felt like he would never see again. And he had never been more relieved to see a familiar face in all of his life.

“Die!” the vocalist called out, able to make out the face even with his abused eyes. “Die, thank God!” he yelled through tears, both from pain and relief at seeing the guitarist.

Die was quick to run down the stairs towards the frightened vocalist, Kyo stumbling to his feet and opening his mouth to explain what had happened before he suddenly felt the other's strong fingers grab hold of his hair and yank him back up the stairs. Kyo was confused, wondering why the other was bringing him back the way he had came. “Die, no! Fucking stop! He's there, he'll force me back! Please Die we have to leave!”

“Shut the fuck up,” the guitarist hissed, fury evident in his voice.

And it hit him. This was the same voice of the man who had held him captive. How had he not realized this before? Why hadn't he recognized Die's voice? His mind had probably been too panicked to recognize anything that was even remotely familiar. “Die,” Kyo whispered, staring up at the blurry face of the man he thought was someone he could trust. “No, this is a joke, this can't...It's not...What the fuck!”

It felt like his entire world was crashing down around him. Die was the one who did all this? Die? Why would he pull all this? He never thought that the man was really insane, let alone had some sort of weird obsession with him. Though it made sense now that he thought about it, the way the guitarist would always try to be around him, the stares during lives, everything...But what had pushed Die to suddenly kidnap him? Nothing made sense! Absolutely nothing. He wanted to scream, anything but this.

He clawed at the guitarist's wrists, screaming at the top of his lungs and cursing up a storm as he was dragged down the hall and back towards the room that he most certainly did not want to be in. Kyo could feel another panic attack coming on and he began to kick, punch, scratch, claw the man currently ripping the blonde from his hair. “Let go! Die let me go! Stop it!” he screamed.

“You're a fucking liar, Kyo! You tricked me! You made me believe you loved me. You fucking whore!” Die yelled right on back, and Kyo had to wonder where the hell they were as surely people were not living in this building. Someone would have called the cops or come out by now.

“I don't fucking love you, you psycho bastard!” Kyo screamed, punching him repeatedly in the stomach but he felt weak, malnourished. Which made sense as the guitarist sure as hell didn't feed him like a normal human being would.

He was pushed back into the room and thrown to the floor, door slammed shut behind Die as he made a move to approach the blonde. Startled and all kinds of frightened, the blonde shot to his feet and fled to the one place he knew Die couldn't get him—the bathroom. He slammed the door in the guitarist's face, locking it shut and ignoring the loud banging noises on the other side and the curses coming from Die. Kyo was too confused, too startled to think about that. He paced the floor of the small bathroom, his eye sight returning finally and the blurs subsiding and making actual shapes.

As he paced he caught the startling sight of his reflection in the mirror. Kyo turned abruptly, staring at himself with obvious disgust. He leaned forward, tracing the lines of his cheek bones on his face as he stared at himself in horror. During his stay he had lost a significant amount of weight and muscle, positive that it ranged from around ten to fifteen pounds. His hair had grown out, his roots dark and contrasting startlingly with the blonde of his hair that used to take up all of his head. His eyes were blood shot, probably from the lack of proper sleep and the lack of exposure to sunlight.

Kyo began to panic, looking around for something that would be able to tell him the time. Anything, he looked on the counter and sink, spotting a small digital clock that flashed the time with English numerals. He picked up the small device, reading the numbers. 11:34 pm, November 11th. Kyo's heart stopped for a moment and he panicked. This couldn't be right. It would mean that he had been in this place for at least five months. The thought panicked him and he screamed, throwing the clock at the door.

This wasn't happening. He didn't know what was a lie and what was the truth anymore. Kyo wasn't getting out of this, he wasn't. He had to kill himself. The blonde ran to the bath tub and turned on the water with a shaky hand, putting the stopper in with every intention of killing himself. He waited nervously as the pounding on the door grew louder, more frantic with each passing second. Kyo screamed loudly as the door came off the hinges and swung open, an infuriated looking Die stalking over towards the shocked looking vocalist.

Die grabbed him by the throat, choking any chance of screaming out of Kyo as he slammed him stomach first into the counter. He held him by the neck like one would a dog that misbehaved, pressing his cheek into the cool surface of the counter. “You fucking bitch! How dare you do anything without asking me first! After I fucking did so much for you?”

What had he done for him? Taken advantaged of his incapacitated and vulnerable state? Fuck him.

“It's about fucking time I start getting some benefits from you, Kyo. I'm not waiting anymore.”

Benefits? What kind of benefits did he expect to get from him? There was nothing Kyo could offer. Though it clicked in his head what exactly Die wanted as he felt his jeans that he wore unbuttoned. Panic overwhelmed him and he began to trash violently under Die's hold, ignoring the choking to his throat and the crushing pain in his skull as he was pressed harder face-first against the ceramic counter.

“Die, no! Please! Don't! I can't, Die please don't do this to me!” the blonde wailed, hysterical. He didn't want to be raped, he didn't.

“Shut the fuck up, Kyo. With the shit you write you should be getting off to this. I bet you secretly want me to fuck you, you God damn whore,” the guitarist scoffed, yanking the material down to Kyo's ankles and forcing him to be devoid of clothing from the waist down. He was quick to unbutton his own jeans and pull his already hardened cock out from the slit with a satisfied groan. Clearly the vocalist's struggling did quite the number on the less than all there guitarist.

Kyo was trembling head to toe, sobbing hysterically as his body tensed in fear. “Why? Why?” he wailed loudly, nails digging into the counter as he feared for the worst. He kept his eyes closed shut, not wanting to see Die's expression through the mirror or the helpless look on his own face. He could hear the sound of a cabinet opening, a bottle opening, and then Die's moans. Kyo knew what he was doing and he swallowed a few times to try and rid himself of the lump in his throat but it didn't help any, the fear was still there ten fold.

The moment Kyo felt the head of Die's erection pressed against him he sobbed harder, body shaking from the force. And before he could even offer another plea for the other to stop, his body was invaded. A harsh scream was ripped from Kyo's throat as his eyes clenched, body tense. He could feel his body being ripped apart from the inside, blood trickling from him and running down his trembling thighs. Even with the lubricant Die had used it didn't ease the pain. The son of a bitch could have at least tried to make this easier on him.

Die was quick to set a violent pace into the small body beneath him, Kyo feeling his stomach churn in disgust each time he pushed forward and his hips would touch his ass. The guitarist was moaning without regard, thrusting in and out of Kyo and ignoring the fact that he was bleeding and screaming bloody murder in pain. Kyo's throat felt just as raw as his inside, and against his better judgment he opened his eyes.

Through his tear-filled eyes he caught his reflection, bent over and filled like a dog. His lips were parted and breathing heavy, cheek red from being pressed into the counter for so long. Die's eyes were closed in ecstasy as he used Kyo's body for his own amusement, moans and groans leaving his lips each time he pushed in and out of Kyo. There was no pleasure for the younger man, he felt nothing but pain as he was ripped apart from the inside.

Gradually his screaming stopped and he was replaced with a numb feeling, able to hear the sound of the water still running in the tub. Kyo grunted every time his body was jerked forward as Die pushed into him, focusing instead on the sound of the water running as he stared at his reflection in disgust. He was a whore. This was what whores did, right? They let people fuck them. And that was exactly what he was doing, he was letting his band mate and what he thought was his friend fuck him. Maybe this was what his life had added up to. This was his worth.

Die let out an almost inhuman moan as he came inside of the trembling blonde, Kyo grimacing in disgust at the feeling. His insides burned, nothing felt more disgusting in his entire life. He was relieved the moment Die pulled himself out of him, hand leaving his sore neck as he glanced down at the blank looking blonde.

“Good night, Kyo,” he said after a moment's staring, leaving the bathroom and disregarding the broken door.

Kyo didn't sink to the floor until he heard the door to the windowless room shut and the lock echoed even in the bathroom. He was locked from the inside, no escape. His knees finally gave out and he sobbed softly, falling onto the ground. The water finally flooded over the bathtub and spilled onto the tiled floor Kyo laid down upon. He laid there for a good while, sobbing hysterically as he pulled his knees to his chest and watched in disgust as his blood and Die's semen intermingled with the pure water that caressed and stroked his used body.